Lynsey Logan, a London-based novelist, usually keeps the plots of her novels a secret. One evening, her best friend, Emma Carmichael, comes to discuss her list of characters, who Lynsey finds most unpleasant. The worst character is a Broadway ‘hoofer’, a song and dance queen called Lynda Lombardi who is appearing in a Broadway show called ‘Bitches on Broadway’. She has a daughter called Isabel, and a highly objectionable grandson called Peter, whose chief desire is to murder his grandmother, so he, his mum and dad could inherit her house in Beverly Hills.
Lynsey is horrified to wake up the next morning to discover that all her characters have moved into her apartment in Belsize Park and declare they have come to lodge with her. Like a good hostess, Lynsey takes Isabel and Peter to the Tower of London and arranges for Lynda to tour the National Theatre in London. She also arranges for her friend, Emma, to come and meet them all one evening; Lynsey and Lynda cook up a big chilli, and after a heavy meal and too much red wine, Emma decides to stay the night.
Much to Lynsey’s horror, they wake up in New York, in an apartment that Lynda has rented in New York, minus clothes or papers. Emma insists on seeing the sights of New York, and she and Lynsey visit the Tenement Museum in downtown New York where they visit the famous Katz Deli. After seeing Lynda in her ‘Bitches on Broadway’ show, they get arrested for being mixed up in a #MeToo demonstration outside the theatre. Lynda is now keen for them to return to London. Lynda’s agent arranges for Emma and Lynsey to return to Southampton on a Cunard Liner returning after an onboard literary festival if Lynsey teaches some creative writing courses during the return cruise. He also arranges for Lynsey’s neighbour to use her key safe to extract her passport from her apartment and do the same in Emma’s apartment. This works and the three of them return by taxi to London. Lynsey happily packs up all the clothes she has borrowed to post back to New York, then goes to bed exhausted. She is awoken the next morning by the sound of somebody moving around her apartment, is it all happening again?