When New Zealand schoolteacher Chris Valli confiscated a student’s cell phone during class, he never imagined it would cost him his career and ultimately, deregistration. Cast out by the system he once served for 10 years, Chris was left questioning everything he believed about respect, consequences and having the mental health strategies or behavioural toolbox to cope as a former primary school teacher who transitioned to secondary.

In the ashes of his teaching career, Chris finds a new voice—as a journalist and author in what he describes as owning his mistakes and truths. With raw honesty and insight, he chronicles the silent struggles inside classrooms, the moral grey zones teachers walk daily, and the dangerous power of community public perception in the age of viral outrage.

Put the Phone Away is a powerful memoir of redemption, reinvention, and resilience. It’s a story for every teacher who’s ever felt powerless, for every parent navigating the digital minefield, and for every reader who’s ever wondered what really happens behind the school gates.

With humour, heartbreak, and hard-earned wisdom, Chris Valli shows that sometimes, losing everything can help you find your true calling. Chris says his growth didn’t come from success but from sitting with the truth he once tried to avoid. “Teaching made me perform. Writing made me reflect. And in that reflection, I finally found myself. Vulnerability is a strength.”

Chris Valli was an outgoing teacher, father, husband, and community man. However, beneath the surface, he was juggling too much: teaching by day, musical theatre by night, a strained marriage, and a growing sense of disconnect within himself. In one moment of exhaustion and reactivity, it all came crashing down. An investigation. Public headlines. A lost job. A lost identity.

Put the Phone Away is about acknowledging one’s failures and growth. It’s a story about presence and what happens when you’re forced to stop scrolling, stop performing, and start healing. Today, Chris is a speaker, writer, partner, and father, and lives in Marlborough, New Zealand.

Customer Reviews

5.0

9 reviews

Weavy

If you’re after a book that is honest, confronting, and deeply human, then Put the Phone Away by Chris Valli is well worth your time. It’s a deeply personal and unfiltered memoir about losing everything, owning your mistakes, and finding a way forward. Chris opens up about the incredibly difficult seasons he has walked through — the setbacks, the scrutiny, and the personal battles — and what happens when life doesn’t go to plan. More importantly, he shows what can happen when you choose to face those hard times head-on and begin the work of rebuilding. What stands out most is the courage in the telling. There’s no hiding behind excuses or shifting blame. Chris owns his mistakes and invites readers into the uncomfortable but necessary space of growth. It makes you question your own choices, your own resilience, and what it really means to be present — not just with your phone put away, but in life. This book isn’t just a story about losing a career. It’s about losing your footing — and finding it again. If you value honest storytelling, believe in backing locals, and want to read something that genuinely makes you reflect, then Put the Phone Away is a book worth picking up.
Aaron Falvey

This is the kind of book that doesn’t try to impress you. It tries to tell the truth. What stands out most is the honesty. There’s no hiding behind excuses or pretending to have it all figured out. It’s a real account of someone navigating pressure, mistakes, identity, and the uncomfortable reality of being human. That takes guts. Especially in a world where most people only show the polished version of their lives. What makes the story powerful is the willingness to sit in the hard moments rather than run from them. It shows that setbacks don’t define you unless you let them. Growth comes from facing things head-on, taking responsibility, and doing the internal work most people avoid. There’s also a bigger message underneath it all. This book challenges the idea that strength means silence. It shows that vulnerability isn’t weakness. It’s awareness. It’s ownership. And ultimately, it’s the starting point for real change. You don’t have to share the same profession or life experience to connect with it. Anyone who has faced pressure, judgement, or their own internal battles will recognise parts of themselves in these pages. This is more than a personal story. It’s a reminder to slow down, reflect, and be present. To stop performing. To stop hiding. And to start being honest with yourself. It takes courage to live it. It takes even more courage to write it.
Brendon

Put the phone away shows that it is ok to not be ok sometimes. That to open up and show vunerability is such a powerful strength that should be nurtured into the new normal in society especially with men. This brave autobiography highlights that we are all human and we do all make mistakes, but it takes true character to own your mistakes to learn from them and to grow from them. Chris should be proud of this autobiography, he has shown courage in sharing his ups and downs through life. After reading this book i have thought alot about my own mental health journey and life, to look at my journey, to challenge and better myself. I am grateful that there are men like Chis out there that are promoting mens mental health and challenging the traditional views of what it means to be a real man.
Cheryl

I highly recommend "Put the Phone Away", a beautifully written book that comes straight from the authors heart. It is relatable to anyone who has felt they have come to the end of themselves and had to forge new beginnings. It is an honest depiction of men's mental health. It shows how essential it is to communicate openly, and that vulnerability can be one's greatest strength. A fantastic read!
Linda

Chris's memoir is a very raw and honest account of a man who has faced some incredibly challenging moments in his life and worked hard to rebuild himself. It doesn’t shy away from the difficult realities of hitting rock bottom, and in that sense it feels deeply authentic. The book is written from the heart, capturing experiences as they were lived rather than polished for effect. Readers who have faced personal setbacks or are navigating their own every day challenges may find comfort and encouragement in knowing they’re not alone. Above all, this book stands as a testament to resilience, self-reflection, and the courage it takes to tell one’s own story.
Doug Avery

I congratulate Chris on his raw account of his years teaching and with his writing experience. He has demonstrated how vulnerable we all are and how he cpoed showing real resilience. Many thought provoking lessons for any reader. Put the Phone Away has great thought patterns for all readers Doug
Aimee

Put the Phone Away is an honest and meaningful book that Chris Valli should be proud of. He openly shares his mistakes and shows courage in taking responsibility for them. This book is a powerful reminder that growth often begins when we slow down, stop performing and start paying attention. I would recommend this book for anyone interested in personal development, mental health, and honest reflections on being present and accountable.
Trish

Put the Phone Away is a raw, courageous, and deeply human memoir that pulls back the curtain on modern education, accountability, and the cost of standing in the grey spaces of authority. Written by New Zealand teacher Chris Valli, the book traces a dramatic fall from professional respect to public scrutiny—and, ultimately, to personal clarity. Valli begins his story at what should have been a career peak. After successfully transitioning from primary to secondary teaching in 2019, he found himself immersed in a system increasingly shaped by technology, policy, and fear of error. That fear became reality when a routine classroom moment—confiscating a student’s smartphone—spiralled into a formal investigation. By January 2024, Valli was deregistered as a teacher, marking what many would consider the end of a vocation. What makes Put the Phone Away compelling is not the incident itself, but how Valli chooses to confront it. Rather than positioning himself as a victim, he writes with honesty, humility, and reflection. He interrogates his own decisions while also questioning the structures that allowed a single moment to eclipse years of service. The result is a memoir that feels balanced, thoughtful, and emotionally grounded. At its core, the book is about failure—not as an endpoint, but as a catalyst. Valli powerfully reframes failure as the greatest measure of growth and vulnerability as the truest form of courage. His willingness to sit with discomfort, shame, and uncertainty gives the narrative its strength. Readers are not asked to absolve him, but to understand him. Beyond education, Put the Phone Away speaks to anyone who has experienced public judgement, career collapse, or identity loss. Teachers will find it especially resonant. Ultimately, Put the Phone Away is not about a phone, a rule, or a system—it’s about what happens when a person decides to tell the truth, even when it costs them everything. It is a brave, timely, and necessary read.
Rachael

Put The Phone Away is a real-life story where the author shares hardships and triumphs without sugarcoating. Its shows vulnerability with strength, words that offer genuine insights into life's ups and downs.